Another owning up….

So after I published my post last night, I lost it….between the anxiety level I had been suppressing since I saw the eye doctor last week making me feel like I had an extreme problem with my right eye…and eating 1/2 a bowl of strawberry ice cream which I counted in to my daily quota which all was good, but the sugar in it lit my fragile brain on fire and the cravings, urges and all that go with that unbearable…so I gave in…I ended up eating 1000 (992) calories in carbs before going to bed at 11p…I am not beating myself up, just trying to understand why I am still having issues with my anxiety over medial issues…Ahhhhhhhhhh   its crazy….and maddening…

I went to my specialist eye appointment this morning…had to be there at 8am…so made for a short night since I was up stressing…well I do have early stages of macular degeneration, which I already knew, however its not dire…he doesn’t even want to see me for 2-3 years and then just to check on the progression of it…of course unless there is any problems …he said I had 20/20 vision in both eyes, no problem…he advised me of some things I can do to help slow down the progression of the macular…yay and I have been doing them without knowing they are helping the macular…so all’s good there…

So again I lost control over a situation I had no control over….it was an unknown fear I was worrying about….so I need to work on dealing with these type of situations better….aghhhhhh

so I just needed to state out load that I screwed up big time last night…own it and move on…once again….learn from my screw up…have more faith that I can deal with the unknown….

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11 thoughts on “Another owning up….

  1. Nobody’s perfect! Don’t be too hard on yourself. As for the anxiety, like Tom Petty says, “Most things I worry about never happen anyway.” Easier said than done, to squash those negative thoughts of worry and angst, and I’m as guilty as anyone of going there. If you figure out how to quiet those voices, please fill me in. 😃

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    • thanks….that is part of my leaf on my health kick, own up the stupid mistakes….and yes it would of been so easy to just continue the next morning to keep eating…thanks for all your encouragement and your so inspiring too….

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  2. you are doing an amazing job! I have had huge problems with anxiety over medical stuff! I think we are used to seeing it all doom and gloom on the media about this subject and you are in your 50’s so am I! It’s ok just keep going you are inspiring!

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  3. Medical stuff is frightening and it is natural to be anxious. Your default mechanism is to reach for the ‘wrong’ foods. But you are aware, you make yoursef accountable and you nknow what the root cause was. All positives so no need to dwell just keep on doing the amazing job you are doing 🙂

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